Yielding to Harvey
GLENDALE, CA [NotS] We have to talk about something here. First, let's look at a jpeg. It's worth 30,224 bytes, and possibly a thousand words.
Featured News
The Year We Reestablish Contact
I took a year or two off from NotS. Kinda. I've actually been writing NotSish things back at gremlin.net, and I could probably copy most of them over here now; but I'd kinda been neglecting NewsoftheStoopid.com itself, simply because Joomla sucked. Technically, it didn't suck; but it was annoying
Rocket Science
Y'know...some of us can actually do rocket science. And we're getting a little tired of hearing how everything's not rocketscience. We know it's not rocket science because, see, we can do rocket science and...other things are different than rocket science. So...just cut it out. Okay? Great. Thanks.
2012
Want the numerological proof of 2012? Okay: here goes. 2+0+1+2=5; five in binary is 00000101; that can be shortened to 101, which looks like lol. Because it's a fucking joke.
BigBen
Darwin first published his Theory of Evolution in 1859. Also in 1859, the first supercomputer was activated; it was called BigBen. Yeah: both evolutionary biology and computer sciences have marched on a bit in the last 150 years.
Colourblind
Being colourblind, my sense of hearing is far greater than average. Unless I hear something grey.
Aptitude
Even now, as an adult, I perform well beyond my agegroup. For example, my parallel parking skills are those of a guy in his nineties. Who's legally blind. And suffers from narcolepsy.
American Idolatry
American Idolatry is the most popular television show in the nation. Good night, and have a stoopid tomorrow.
Late at Night
Sometimes, late at night, I'll lay there in bed, staring up at the stars, wondering where in hell the ceiling is.
GerbilFucking
There's nothing inherently wrong with gerbilfucking, but...be real: are you seriously gonna call it 'in a day or so'?
Fun with Antismokers
Wanna have fun with antismoking 'tards? Easy. Buy some smokes. Open them. Take one out, but don't light it. Wander around, pretending to smoke it in public. Count the emotionally motivated imbeciles coughing themselves half to death through pure psychosomatic fragility. Whee.
Making the Grade
Okay. First of all, I grade hard. Keep that in mind. In fact, I grade harder when I'm grading someone at least purporting to be in a position of educa
Gynocrisy
Germany [NotS] By Gremlin I have to explain something here. But, first, people being fragile morons, I should explain something else. I'm okay wi
The Redistribution of Wealth
Anyone else getting a little tired of economic stopgap suggestions from people who can't do math? Me too. And I was reminded of that today when a gota
Television
As a rule, I don't do requests. Okay: sometimes I do; but only if I was gonna do it anyway. Not really the point. The actual point is that Hunter
News of King Stoopids
It's funny. Everyone I know refers to KingSoopers as KingStoopids; they always have. Which probably isn't a secret: in the nineties, I wrote a couple
Feminazism
Okay. Things are getting a bit out of hand. For example, if I'm not out saving handicapable puppies by supporting Hilarious Clinton, I'm reportedly so